Deep Thoughts

If God lives inside us, like some people say, I sure hope he likes enchiladas because that's what he's getting.

-Jack Handy

This past week, my mind has been elsewhere. In the quiet moments all of my thoughts and feelings have turned to the intense emotions that envelop the bereaved. Until my son died, I didn't understand Grief. Now that we are well acquainted, we have become friends of sorts. We do everything together...laugh...cry...and long for what should have been. And just when I think I totally get it, Grief hits me upside the head in an unanticipated move.

On Friday, April 16th, Shea, the 5 year old grandson of one of our driving instructors, ran in back of his father's vehicle as it was backing out of the driveway. It struck him and he died. I have never met Shea, yet all of the emotions that surround my own son's death creep to the surface and I relive the pain of my own circumstance. I am devastated for Shea's family. Especially, his father.

What can we do to go back in time and change something? The short answer is we can't. Our intelligence tells us what's done is done. But the heart longs for a different outcome. Reconciling the heart and mind takes time and divine help. The questions of "why?" start flooding in and are met with "how?" Our brains don't get it. When we never wanted to hurt anyone and were attentive to the driving task, how could we not control the outcome? How can I, as a driver's ed instructor, teach my students what they must do to become collision-free for life when I know that sometimes in spite of all precaution Grief knocks on unsuspecting doors every day and tragedies happen? But it's not fair! True, it's not. But that's not the point. The point is that we do our best and turn the rest over to our Creator. Simple? Yes. Easy? Not a chance.

Sweet Angel Shea, you are missed. I hope you're playing Rock Band in heaven and loving it. Say hi to my boy. He's the little guy always grinning as he unplugs your power supply.

And The Winner Is...

Amber! We will be in touch.

I placed each one of your names on an excel spreadsheet with what you did for that entry. This morning, I asked my 3 and 5 year old boys to pick a number. They picked number 10, which was Amber's for becoming a Facebook Fan. Then thinking that maybe that wasn't random enough, I went to www.random.org and popped in the numbers. It came back with 5, which was Amber's from writing a blog post about this giveaway. So any way you slice it or dice it, Amber is the winner. Congratulations!!! 

True Random Number GeneratorMin: Max: Result:5Powered by RANDOM.ORG

Giveaway

Motivation is a funny thing. Because of yesterday's post, I went to the fabric store this morning and spent 45 minutes trying to decide which one would make the cutest litter bags for my car. I'm having so much fun with them that I want to share one with someone super lucky (and diligent). And don't make any comments about the mess in my car. These litter bags are hot off the press.

Here's the skinny on how to win this giveaway:

1. Leave me a comment telling me, as the winner, which pattern you like best (photo above) or if you'd like a different color scheme that better suits you.

2. Get another two entries for each of the following you do:

• Become a follower of this blog.
• Follow me on Twitter: http://twitter.com/TeachDefensive
• Become a Facebook fan of Defensive Driving School http://www.facebook.com/pages/Defensive-Driving-School/357474976996?ref=ts

3. Get five more chances to win if you blog about this giveaway and link it back to this post.

4. Leave me a comment telling me how many chances to win you earned.

5. Deadline! You have until Thursday, April 22, 2010 to enter. Winner will be announced on Friday, April 23rd.

The New Rule

When we took our stuff out of our old family car last summer, we didn't bother to shovel out the cracker crumbs or black banana peels. We just left it in all it's glory at the dealership and drove home in our very first brand new car. It was spotless. And to keep it that way, we created a new rule: no eating in the car. It seemed simple enough that even my boys (ages 5, 4, and 3 at the time) could follow it. My youngest child however, little Jocelyn, at one year of age had different plans. She was the single most contributing factor that led to the demise

Embrace Life

I believe this is the most beautiful video I have seen on seat belts. It changes the focus from blood and guts to love of life. It's both subtle and delicate.

Reflection in the Window

Yesterday, I took my kids on an all day outing. We left about 9:30 in the morning and ended up getting home at close to one in the morning. On the way home I was tired. Really tired.

My Dad taught me years ago one of the most effective lessons ever on drowsy driving. If he was tired and rolling down the window or the radio wasn't helping, he would pull over and sleep somewhere for a while. When I was a child, the son of a close family friend was driving down a mountain pass and fell asleep at the wheel. He went off the road and was involved in a serious collision. He lost both of his legs. Another one of my parent's friends was driving on a road trip and fell asleep at the wheel. When the crash happened, her husband was ejected from the car and died. Seeing the example of my father when he is tired and knowing that crap happens when we least expect it has a way of working itself into the subconscious. I know it could happen to me.

Report

It's official. I have made it 3 days without using the phone while drivng. Yes!!! I can do this.

Distracted

Last week, I found out that April was National Distracted Driving Awareness Month and once again, I have been struggling with what this means to me. I am constantly distracted while driving. It most often happens when my children wait until we're all loaded up to start poking their sibling and I am left as the mediator. Or when my morning routine hasn't gone as smoothly as I planned and I am left grabbing a bite to eat on the go. My favorite distraction is my cell phone. Luckily, I'm not driving a manual transmission. That would just prove to complicate things further.