Thursday, April 21, 2011


I came across this joke today and laughed then sighed. Mainly because it's so true. I am reminded of the time I took my grandmother to renew her license. It wasn't until she told the licensing officer that she'd never lost consciousness (she'd had a couple of strokes) that I began to comprehend how much the ability to drive is linked to an elderly person's sense of self and independence.
A group of retirees were discussing their medical problems at the Senior Center over coffee one morning.
"Do you realize," said one, "My arm is so weak I can hardly hold this coffee cup."
"Yes, I know." replied the second, "My cataracts are so bad I can't see to pour the coffee."
"I can't turn my head," rejoined the third, "because of the arthritis in my neck."
"My blood pressure pills make my dizzy," commented the fourth, adding, "I guess that's the price we pay for getting old."
"Let's look at the bright side," piped up the first, "We should be thankful that we can still drive." -submitted to

And unrelated to the first, this one made me laugh on a few different levels:

I tell you, women drivers are a hazard to traffic. Driving to work this morning on the freeway, I looked over to my left and there was a woman in a red Mustang doing 85 miles per hour with her face up next to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner!
I looked away for a couple seconds and when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane.
It scared me so bad I dropped my electric shaver in my coffee, and it spilled all over my cell phone! - submitted to

I'd love to hear your driving jokes. Please share!

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Traffic Calming Device

I saw this sign yesterday and my curiosity got the best of me. I had to know what a traffic calming device was and made a little detour on my route just to go down this road. Imagine my surprise when I didn't find classical music being broadcast for all to hear, but instead it was just a warning sign for some speed bumps ahead. Ha ha ha. Funny sign.

Traffic calming device sign.

Monday, April 4, 2011

"Concerned Motorist"

Dear Concerned Motorist,

Thank you for notifying the authorities about my alleged HOV infraction. They mailed me a pamphlet on how to use the carpool lane. I've always wondered what happens when someone calls the 1-800-HERO line. Now I know.

You must have been the lonely driver next to me...resenting the fact that I was passing you. Maybe you thought I was the type of person who throws caution to the wind and drives on the wild side. It's nice to be thought of that way, even if misguided. Ahhh, to be so young again!
I do have a question though, how did you miss my four children in the back?  Or did you think that they were part of my cover? It would have been a good idea, really. I should invest in blow up dolls to sit in my kids' car seats. I'd even turn on the rear entertainment system to complete the effect. Then I'd get all the benefits of the carpool lane without any of the back seat bickering that usually accompanies it. 
WSP HOV Infraction Notice
I wonder if the Washington State Patrol would facilitate mailing you a "not a ticket" infraction notice to get you to go to the optometrist? Like you, I am a concerned motorist. The WSP probably also has a brochure they could send you about the 20/40 vision requirement to drive legally...and perhaps they also have a brochure on tattling that they could throw in.

Maybe I'm being judgmental. I'm sure you thought you were doing the right thing.

(The lady with lots of kids and tinted windows.)
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